9/4/09


Douglas is a pain.
Been for a pint--
he says,

Mind boggles at the truth!

David does my head in !
He steals and overwhelms!

Jack is a true troubadour!

I'm putting on a brave face!
Today was difficult.

Did'nt go out,
So stuck with the memories
Of yesterday-
Like a film replaying itself,
I'm stuck on rewind/rut.
When I want action/cut !


12/4/09


pardon the pun!
Theres a hole in your plum !
Early to rise
Make mine a feast of bird pies!

Where I can touch the skies,
for one of your lies!
And feel happy again;
A Brubeck reprise!!!

16/4/09


A good nurse, like Amy, will buy you sanitary towels!
She'll always endeavour to put you first, even at her own detriment.
She'll laugh and lift you out of your depression.
She'll turn every stone over, until there are no skeletons left in your closet !

A good nurse? Maybe she'll or he'll be like Denis;
Calm in the storm, golden honey in a desert.
Quick to help, slow to temper.

He'll always have patience, for that his virtue in care may be realised and established.


I admire the nurse who does all this.
In my heart , I know he's informative / a friend,
In my eyes I can see him perservering,
and recovery for his clents, is regenerative.
In my mind I know recovery is his purpose.


To all good men and women, the skies the limit !

I admire the nurse who does all this, so that I may sleep easier,
have less rows with my family and be at peace or a place of safety.

With all the adversity, I say thankyou
So that there maybe hope,
And faith, hope and charity
are clearly our purpose!

With all the sadness comes spring-

Out of the strong came sweetness.



And what I really want is the love of a good man.
A man like my psychiatrist.

A celebrity male on TV
Lives life for the cameras-
is he in love with his own image.
Can I make the grade ?

The first time ever I saw your face,
Yourself is an ocean
Cleansing deep into your soul !

I still havent found what I'm looking for

The fundamental reason
in this poem, has been overlooked.

15th of April, 2009.

Todays weather is rain!

Feeling shaky, tired, heavy!

gilledwards

4/4/09





Lamb chop boiled stew.


Trip to Germany-Nena-singer.


Wiesbaden when 15.





Onions,cabbage, potatoes and lamb chops--all boiled into a stew.


Southern Germany-Wiesbaden, glass factory. First time I recognise myself, my purpose.

An affinity with the German girl of the family whose home we stayed at. Bought the German magazine like our Smash Hits come Jackie.



Bratwurst sausages, Dad cooked, in a casserole, fresh from the supermarket.

We walked beyond the village,through fields of golden corn and arrived at a farm house. saw a pen of big rabbits. There was a German farmer and his wife. I managed to talk with them, as I was learning German in school.



The farmer and his wife were welcoming, warm and special.

Dad drove the car along the Rhein river. I'd heard that sirens lured unsuspecting sailors to their end along the rocks. I knew a few modern day ones like Nena Hager and Nena who had a big hit with 99 red balloons !

Mum had to replace the coffee jug as theirs accidently got broken. Frankfurt airport was modern. The exchange family was staying in our house in the Mumbles, Swansea.
Mum bought me Kim Wildes album,'Water on glass' whilst there.

I had a great feeling, as I was not quite grown up and not quite teenager, I was somewhere in the middle and it made me feel great; as if on the point of liberation, like when the Berlin wall came down !